April 1, 2008

This is one doodle that can't be un-did, Homeskillet


Okay, I just walked in and I had to HAD TO blog about my experience at Scooter's. Now that I think about it, perhaps it wasn't as awful and hilarious as I thought. But humor me.
After running this evening I decided I was in the mood to nullify anything gained from my run by treating myself to a
Peanut Butter Espresso Smoothie at Scooter's Coffee House. As I walked in to the place, I noticed a short girl behind the counter who remarkably resembled Juno...from Juno...only not pregnant. As I approached the counter I noticed she was looking at me. Her lips were moving a little bit, but were emitting no sound that I could detect, so I just stood there and looked at the pretty pastries while I waited to be attended to.
Shortly thereafter I looked up again to catch her looking at me, rather intently this time, and her lips were definitely moving. Still no sound came to my ears.
"
Are you talking to me?" I asked loudly.
She stepped closer to me and I interpreted from slight sounds and the movement of her mouth that apparently I looked like a "smoothie person" and didn't I want a smoothie?
"
Do I want a smoothie?" I said, loudly again. A nod.
"
Yes. I want a Peanut Butter Espresso Smoothie, medium please."
Her lips started to move again. Great. I thought she might have said something about white chocolate or mocha and I said, loudly:
"
No...Peanut Butter!"
The attitude she suddenly took on made her even more like Juno...except not so endearing.
"Do you want regular mocha or white chocolate in your peanut butter shake." She dead-panned.
"Just regular mocha please..."
Then there was a long pause. This girl worked long and hard on this drink...I think I stood there about 10 minutes. Finally, she turned towards me, not with a smoothie, but a hot coffee drink.
She set the coffee on the counter and looked past me to a man sitting at a table.
"Your Americano." she murmured.
No response.
Then suddenly I heard a loud, "PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSST!!!"
This noise came from little Juno! The man looked up, annoyed, and little Juno gave him this look that said, "I told you your Americano was ready like a million times!"
With that, she turned and started banging things around, like she was really ticked off about this, and, I hoped, started throwing together a Peanut Butter Espresso Smoothie. She threw the espresso grindings into the trash. She threw a gob of peanut butter into the blender. She threw the plastic smoothie cup onto the counter, and so on.
Despite the fact that she was throwing things around, she still managed to move at the rate of a giant slug near death. Meanwhile, I noticed that there was a minivan sitting outside the drive-thru window that had been there since I had. I could see two impatient soccer moms glaring through the window, watching little Juno's every sluggish movement.
Finally, she moseyed over to the counter with my smoothie, carefully set it on the counter, and mumbled something. I can only assume it was the price of my drink. She stuck her hand out and cocked her head to one side and I laid a five dollar bill in her outstretched palm. Then she handed me my change. But rather than starting on the angry soccer moms' drinks, she stood there and watched me put my change away, grab a straw, tear off the paper, stick the straw in my drink, find my keys, pick up my drink, and head for the door.
When I turned and looked back at the door she was still standing there, head cocked, weight shifted to one leg, with that classic "I don't really care" little Juno look on her face.

Whatever.

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