I'm excited to be writing on here again! My updates will most likely continue to be few and far between until I'm able to figure out a better balance in my life. Honestly, I sit at the computer so much throughout the day that I can hardly bear the sight of one in the evenings. But it's not just the computer. It's the brain power involved in doing...well, anything.
I think that once Daniel and I are able to move into South Austin I won't feel so worn out. Sitting in traffic for nearly an hour in the morning and over an hour every evening really seems to take its toll on me. Although lately it hasn't been taking such a toll on our budget, which is very nice. I am ready to be close to where Daniel and I are living most of our lives. Then I might be able to experience the perks of getting off work at 4:30.
Daniel is away and I miss him. It's funny, one of the challenges of our marriage has been how independent we are. I never really thought of myself as independent, but I have always seen a difference in our relationship versus other married/serious couples. And I don't mean that in a romantic, rebellious sort of way, or even a bad way. Just different. For some reason I feel like we are functioning on an alternate level; we see ourselves and one another different than most I think. Over time (two weeks from today it will be two years of marriage!) our relationship has changed; we've been challenged and hurt and encouraged and loved, and grown so much closer. Our independence (I don't even feel like that's the right word) has remained but we have come to rely on and trust each other more, as people in relationships tend to. I think I've spoken before about how our mutual friendships have led to a deeper, closer friendship between the two of us. And I think that as we've learned through our struggles--I'm not going to sugar-coat here: marriage is really hard sometimes--to rely more and more on Christ for the grace to love one another. Our commitment feels solid and strong. But like I said, there's just something a little different. We are quirky.
I have a vivid memory of my dad calling me into his room for a talk one evening. Now, I don't vividly remember the particulars of that conversation, but I clearly remember him telling me one thing: he thought I was what some would call a "hopeless romantic." And he told me he understood. And he told me to be careful. I think I sort of scoffed like a teenager at the time and shook my head as if I knew better. But he was right.
I still slip into hopeless romantic slumps here and there--not to say that Daniel is never romantic. One morning I might wake up and feel like if Daniel really cared about me, he'd take me on a date. Tonight. Tuesday night. Without any hint from me. You know? It's romance. Isn't it just supposed to "occur" to him that he wants to take me on a date?
And then when we go home and eat left-overs Daniel is dazed and confused because I'm sitting in the corner brooding about the date that never was.
But forget those rare moments. I'm beginning to understand romance a little differently. I think it's romantic that Daniel goes to work every day and works hard and does well at his job. I think it's romantic that we hold hands in the mornings while Daniel drives me to work. I think it's romantic that Daniel helps with the dishes after I cook. And I think it's romantic that he took me to the movies and bought me popcorn on a Sunday night just because I was in the mood.
I don't really know what I'm rambling on about.
I do know that I love my husband, and the more I'm with him the less I can stand being away from him.
I can't wait till he comes home to me!
Can you believe I've almost been married two whole years?!